The Beyond Series and Mancunian Crime Tales: A Year Travelling The UK Coastline in a Motorhome - Newark - Bodelwyddan Castle

MONDAY, 8 DECEMBER 2014 Week 15

What a thoroughly lovely week! First, it was my Birthday. Happy birthday to me. Ah, thank you! So naturally, I’ve spent most of the week celebrating.

We headed to Newark and Brownhills, where we bought our motorhome. The place is great and so big that they have a Bistro, shop, free hook-ups, swimming pool, sauna, Jacuzzi, TV lounge and all the other facilities any sane glamper could need! And it’s all FREE! Bonus. We stayed for two nights so we could sort out all the little problems we’d had with the van before we began our mammoth winter tour of Scotland. Del is happy now because he now knows how to use the central heating system properly, and we can run it off gas OR electricity! So, free heating and toasty toes for me all December, then. Hurray.

We got an added bonus when we discovered Brownhills was offering free Tinsel and Turkey lunches for all members throughout December. So we got a free dinner, crackers, and Christmas hats.

We then headed up to my hometown of Bury and the lock-up to store all the summer gear that’s been weighing us down in the van. Amethyst is probably several tonnes lighter now! But joy, oh joy, my book adverts are working. We parked the van at the lockup, and two car mechanics came over asking about my books. They just whopped their wallets out and bought a load of books for Christmas. Result!

We went out with my family for my birthday and got lots of winter woollies ready for our Scotland Christmas trip. Then we met up with our friends for a catch-up as we’ve not seen them since our wedding in August. I was told that more photos were needed. Guess what? We all forgot to take photos of the time together. Anyway, we had a few drinks around Bury after a great time at Bella Italia; it was a bit odd being back home after all this time, but it was fantastic to see friends.

We then drove Amethyst down to Bodelwyddan Castle for my birthday weekend with my Auntie Doreen and Uncle Dave. I do enjoy driving the van; there’s a certain sense of freedom about it. As a treat, Del had booked one of the enormous Executive rooms. It was a notable change from motorhome living for four nights,

Oh yes and because it was my birthday, Del had arranged a surprise birthday cake, balloons and the entertainment staff singing happy birthday to me in front of a packed restaurant. Thank my darling hubby – I was suitably mortified!

We get there, and on Friday night, we have a cracking meal, lots of FREE drinks and entertainment from Kimika. The opening act was a VT of their past television appearances, which were all from the 8o’s, a VERY young Eamon Holmes and Anne ‘thingy bobs’ from GMTV! I was like, Oh My God! How old is this act gonna be? But actually, I was pleasantly surprised. Granted, the husband and wife act had aged, but rather well, and the comedy in between the singing was very funny. The female singer gave a cracking impression of Tina Turner, and her husband was an amazingly talented guitarist.

Saturday was a pamper morning. I tried Tai Chi for the first time, and I actually felt some things click and ping in my neck and shoulders. Then I went for a facial and massage, which was amazing. Then I went for a swim, sauna, and Jacuzzi. We all went for a lovely drive out to Bets Y Coed, which was so beautifully Christmassy, with a little fair. (I'm Wearing my new bobble hat.)

We went to Swallow Falls, a place of outstanding natural beauty, and were charged £1.50 EACH for the pleasure. We even had to pay through an automatic pay machine, which released the turn-style gate when we paid… Outrageous!! Just to look at a waterfall. (Del is throwing me in the waterfall.) Saturday night, we had a Queen tribute act called Queen. He was very good and sounded just like Freddie Mercury.

I was also accused of being domineering! Me! Really? I was organising our seats so we could all see the stage and a complete stranger said he wouldn’t argue with me because I was domineering! Could you imagine me dominating Del? Hmmm, nope… and no rude comments, please; ah, thank you. Another free night of drinkies meant we were all a little merry, and so we ended the night with some dancing, including our first dance from our wedding… ‘Hello’, by Lionel Ritchie, but sung live by a ‘live’ singer. Lovely.

I was tired on Sunday, so we just pottered around the castle. Doreen and I looked around the historical part of the castle, and Dave and Del tried rifle shooting. I stayed away from the rifle range in case I got shot!
In the afternoon, the hotel entertainment staff decided to use this weekend to practice their Christmas pantomime Aladdin on us poor, unsuspecting residents. Dear Lordy Lord… It was so bad; it was brilliant!

Yes, I enjoyed it because it was so awful… haha haha… There were two staff down for the show, so they got a guy from the bar to stand in. Granted, he was very brave to get up and have a go, but he’d literally had a few hours to practice, so he walked into every scene with the script, and he fluffed his lines so much he confused the rest of the cast to the point where Widow Twankey snatched the script off him to read his (I mean her) own lines….In fact, all the mistakes and ad-libs were funnier than the scripted ones. Someone should tell them to keep them in the performance on the other shows they do… Hahahaa…. Still chuckling at it.